New Escalade Resets the Full-Size SUV Benchmark

I heard the skidding, although it wasn't the kind of screeching that's normally associated with a car sliding out of control.

It looks so good from the front... (Photo: Trevor Hofmann, Canadian Auto Press)

The rain was falling too hard to allow for much friction between rubber and pavement, so it was more of a long, drawn out skid, and then, with enough time for me to look over my shoulder towards the back window while saying"Brace yourselves!"to the kids, something indistinguishable through the soaked rear glass but nevertheless white hit my rear end and shook the Escalade.

Not a big shake mind you, but enough to be sure that someone was going to be paying for damages. I asked the kids if they were alright, at which point came an affirmative but dumbfounded nod from each one, so I stepped out to survey the situation. The something white was a Jeep Cherokee, probably vintage 1988 or so, with

.... but after a quick kick in the pants its not quite as pretty from behind. (Photo: Trevor Hofmann, Canadian Auto Press)

questionable tire treads, as could be guessed. Its left front corner looking pretty pranged up, a realization not lost on the distraught looking driver.

"I'm sorry", he said."You stopped so fast."Yes, I suppose I was lucky not to hit the car in front of me, being that he had braked for a car in front of him who stopped suddenly for a pedestrian who decided to walk out in front of everyone. I had brand new tires, not to mention antilock enhanced four-wheel disc brakes with electronic brake force distribution and brake assist. This poor sod was probably running on worn front pads with worn shoes at the back, and definitely no ABS. I was lucky in another way too. Somehow he had struck the Escalade dead centre, demolishing the plastic trailer hitch cover

The damaged panel, which merely covers the trailer hitch, pulled away easily after twisting a couple of tabs, and it looked like many other Escalades looked, ready to tow something big. (Photo: Trevor Hofmann, Canadian Auto Press)

but doing nothing more. That's a $143 part, with another $50 or so for paint. No doubt, his Washington State insurance adjuster won't even get a call from GM; the legal costs it would incur just filling out the paperwork and making the appropriate calls would far outweigh paying for the part and labour.

After writing down his particulars I climbed back into the Escalade, and once again made my inquiries with the kids. Kaden, my 6 year old son was sitting in the third row (by choice of course), and spoke about how hard the car hit us. I suppose he felt the impact more, or at least heard a much louder thump than I did. His booster seat kept him at the right height so that the seatbelt had worked properly, so he didn't look any worse for wear. Julia, my 13 year old daughter said she hardly felt it, as did my youngest daughter Anika, almost 3 and held in place by a child safety seat latched into place and the

That third row seat, that is accommodating enough for most adults, was my son's favourite perch when in the Escalade. (Photo: Trevor Hofmann, Canadian Auto Press)

n strapped down with the seatbelt for extra precaution. We drove home.

That night, speaking with my wife, I mused about what damage we may have sustained if we weren't in the Escalade, but rather a smaller subcompact or compact. Would we all be booking chiropractic appointments right now? Probably not, but there certainly would have been much more damage sustained to the car, and possibly downtime getting it fixed. No doubt, when it comes to getting hit while stationary, size really does matter.

If I, on the other hand, had been the one traveling behind and needing to avoid the accident by veering out of the way, however, I might be singing a different tune. I'd be cursing its mammoth proportions, frustrated by its archaic live rear axle and be facing a much larger repair bill; there's no trailer hitch cover in the front bumper. Something more agile would have been better, that is until an accident actually occurs, at which time I'd be grateful for having so much vehicle around to protect me and my family.


Does this make any sense or is my brain scrambled from getting hit? There's a myth bantered about by large SUV owners that says they're safer vehicles, due to their mass.

While safer in accidents, the Escalade's overall mass makes it difficult to avoid potential MVAs. (Photo: Trevor Hofmann, Canadian Auto Press)

In the case of my accident, I heartily agree, but this isn't true when taking accident avoidance measures, so are they really that much safer. I suppose that most people aren't trained in proper accident avoidance maneuvers anyway, such as applying opposite lock steering when necessary, and then applying the throttle instead of the brake, when called, so big is probably better after all.

When it came to hauling the family and all of our belongings for the two and a half weeks we had the Escalade, big definitely was a bonus. Even with all three rows in place there was room in the cargo hold for some gear. The liftgate was powered, of course, but the same remote key fob used for lifting it could also pop open the rear glass, for smaller items. This said, mind you, I found it too difficult to reach over and grab whatever was down below, so once tested never used this feature again. Taller folk might not have this issue. The rear seats don't fold into the floor when not in use, but rather lift up and forward on a front hinge, and can be removed entirely if more space is needed. This is good, but not as convenient as it would be if you could simply drop them into the floor like some of the Escalade's rivals. The second row seats work much the same way, and when tipped forward allow

Lots of room to get in and out,of the back, but the mechanism for doing so was a pain to operate. (Photo: Trevor Hofmann, Canadian Auto Press)

enough room to easily crawl into the back. They're a pain to operate though, as sometimes they'd open and close easily, and other times I couldn't get the backrest to go back into place. Actually, in the end I just left it down all week because I couldn't be bothered getting out the manual to figure out whatever intricate system was needed to pull it upright. After all, with seven seats to its credit and only needing five, it simply wasn't necessary. I suppose that's the luxury of size.

There's more to the luxurious experience I had with the Escalade than its interior space, mind you, but rather the overall design itself. Gone is the old model's pickup truck styling motif, replete with brittle plastics, bulbous buttons and acres of fake woodgrain, replaced with an almost European design featuring high quality soft-touch plastics, sophisticated, well damped switchgear and beautiful aluminum trim mixed with less fake woodgrain accents, fortunately. But why knock the fact that the wood isn't real. Rather, let's celebrate the fact that no Brazilian hardwood forests were clear cut in order to make this SUV; other than the steering wheel trim that appears to be the genuine article. Hmmm... why bother?

In

This photo hardly does the clock justice, but I'm just getting used to my latest digital camera; a point and shoot Casio 7.2 mpx about the size of a credit card that I bought at the Frankfurt airport last week. (Photo: Trevor Hofmann, Canadian Auto Press)

the middle of a long span of aluminum, right above the centre stack, sits one of the coolest analog clocks I've ever laid eyes on in any vehicle, setting the tone for the rest of the interior. A large infotainment screen is just below, with an integrated nav system and various controls for adjusting audio settings, or choosing between AM, FM, CD, DVD or XM satellite radio; a personal favourite. The screen turns into a rear-facing camera when you put the gear lever in reverse, and as long as its not raining too hard this increases visibility immensely. The HVAC controls are as easy to use as those for the audio/nav setup, and are fully automatic as is expected in the Escalade's fairly steep price range. A switch for adjusting the foot pedals sits at the very base of the stack, just before the faux wood that trims both sides takes a bend and then levels out, meeting up with the ashtray and cupholders. There's no shifter where a shifter should be, but rather it's located on the steering column just like such things were when I was a kid. In retrospect its probably a more efficient use of space, being that not much can be housed in the air space between the wheel and the gauges as it is, other than the usual stalks for windshield wipers, turn signals and the like.


The leather-clad gear selector features a tow-haul button at its end, that when pressed prepares the Escalade to engine brake when called upon, and activates another switch just to the left for

I love the blue needles... just like the hands on my Cartier Roadster wristwatch. (Photo: Trevor Hofmann, Canadian Auto Press)

rowing through its six forward gears. A nifty idea, I had no application for it due to not even owning a utility trailer. My guess is that those who buy Escalades know exactly what to do with it, and will appreciate the effort Cadillac put into integrating it within the gear lever.

The steering wheel in front of it is an attractive mix of nicely grained plastics, leather and aluminum, accented with an array of buttons for adjusting the audio system and cruise control, among other things. Whether or not you actually use such remote switchgear is beside the point, it needs to be there if you're paying upwards of seventy large for an SUV. Personally, unless the dash mounted controls are awkwardly placed

The wood isn't real, but the leather and aluminum is and it's nicely detailed and wll put together. (Photo: Trevor Hofmann, Canadian Auto Press)

I hardly ever use steering wheel buttons. Of course, if they weren't there I'd be complaining about it, so go figure.

The seats are large and generously padded, yet seemingly infinite adjustability made them comfortably throughout my test period, and the seat heaters (both for the lower seatback and bottom cushion) get hot enough to char a steak let alone slow cook my rump roast.

When I beat up the Escalade a few minutes ago for not having the agility to avoid an accident, I probably wasn't being fair. Sure it labours along with a live rear axle, hopping over bridge or highway expansion joints and getting unsettled when hustling over uneven patches of pavement on curvy stretches of roadway, but for normal use it transitions between lanes quite well and takes to long arcing corners with ease. More important to most who buy large SUVs is a ride quality that few cars can match, and a turning circle that'll embarrass some front-wheel drive economy cars. This makes it easy to maneuver through the city, the experience enhanced with generous sightlines through its large, open greenhouse and a flight traffic controller's view of surrounding vehicles.

And

Get used to its rear end... the Escalade moves quickly for such a large and heavy vehicle. (Photo: Trevor Hofmann, Canadian Auto Press)

when you see an opening, merely tap the throttle and the big SUV muscles forward with the thrust of an A380, or so it seems. Such aggressive acceleration comes via the most powerful gasoline engine in GM's non-commercial arsenal, a 403 horsepower 6.2-litre overhead valve V8 capable of churning out 417 lb-ft of earth shattering torque. Yes, it's a powerhouse that even leaves Chrysler's revered 5.7-litre HEMI quaking in its motor mounts, and when mated to the aforementioned six-speed automatic, it's not even that bad on fuel.

OK, it still sucked back the unleaded at an alarming rate (at least it doesn't need premium), my final fill costing a rather sobering $85 from empty thanks to Transport Canada's rather optimistic 18.1 litres per 100 kilometer city rating, and 12.4 litres per 100 kilometer highway rating. My guess is that its buyers, after dropping a cool $90K for a truck (about the price of my tester) hardly worry about a thousand or so more per year in pump costs. Just throw it on the Amex Platinum and pay it when the bill comes, no doubt, reaping the excess in air miles. But now that I'm talking the hefty price needed to move up from a similarly sized Tahoe, I've got to mention a couple of disappointments.


First, what's with the hokey key fob? Chevy's lowest priced Aveo has a more impressive tool, fully integrating the lock and trunk release buttons into the key itself. The Cadillac, on the other hand,

The key fob and parking brake might be archaic, and the rear wiper left much to be hoped for, but some of the Escalade's more obvious details are wonderfully executed. (Photo: Trevor Hofmann, Canadian Auto Press)

makes use of one of the cheapest looking keys in the industry, with a half-baked crest and wreath embossed with cheesy metallic gold in brittle black plastic. It's an embarrassment, dangling from a thin silver key ring that attaches to an equally hard plastic remote fob of unattractive proportions. Throw that on a table at the pub and the cute little waitress will think you arrived in a ten year old Cavalier. Sure it sports some pretty trick features, such as remote latches for the power liftgate and glass hatch, plus, best of all, a button for starting the car from the comfort of your bar chair, but could Cadillac package it in a more appealing manner? I mean, buy any run of the mill Kia and you'll pocket a key fob that'll get you more respect. Compare what GM offers to any European or Asian luxury model and, well, once again the Caddy fob is ruddy embarrassing.

Another item that will probably only matter to premium car snobs is the Escalade's parking brake. There's nothing wrong with it, other than most rivals boast electronic brakes that only require you to press a button to actuate and the Caddy not only makes you lift your foot to engage, but reach down under the dash fumbling

Ahh, but that grille just stops guys in their tracks... (Photo: Trevor Hofmann, Canadian Auto Press)

for a hand release lever. Egad, can we pull this truck into the 21st century Cadillac?! This was a constant annoyance that would probably cause some people to not use their e-brake at all.

And the rear